Parenting Archives - Sharon M Weinstein

March 20, 2020 By Sharon Weinstein

Life as a Balancing Act…working/schooling at home

Coronavirus has given us a new appreciation for our “spaces.” While many of us are fortunate to have a designated home office, others are not. While some have a designated play space for kids that can be converted in to a mini-schoolroom, others do not. What can you do to keep the balance while confined during this pandemic?

Tips from B is for Balance, 2^nd edition offers this advice:

Create a Designated Work Area at Home

When you are in your home “office,” that’s the time to work, to respond to calls, complete electronic banking, update social media, and reply to electronic mail. When you are finished, walk away from the office and computer. Set aside specific times for checking messages. Then, reward yourself with personal time.

Master Efficiency

Many of us are teleworking; keep in mind that many professionals find it difficult to adjust to working from home, even those who have done it forever. The freedom of working in casual clothing (or not getting out of your pajamas), of not reporting for work at a specific time, and of not being directly supervised by others creates an environment that may become lax. You must be responsible for your own efficiency, effectiveness, and efforts. Is your work environment efficient and ergonomically correct? Does it lend itself to a high level of productivity in a short time span? Are you a morning person—someone who works best in the early hours of the day? Set a schedule to plan your work at home, and then work according to your plan.

Manage your Time Wisely

You schedule appointments with other people in your personal planner, so why not schedule time with yourself? Make appointments for regular exercise or meditation (even more now than ever before). Regardless of whom we are and what we do, we still have the same 24 hours in each day. Do you delegate, or you the one who must do it all to get it right?

Know What Is Important and Why

In his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey showed that for many of us, the day is filled with tasks that attract our attention and seem urgent, but they may never need to be done. Weed those out and make time for the important tasks. The important duties that are also urgent require our immediate attention. Learn to prioritize. Know which of the things you must complete today, or this week, are most important and engage in systems that can help you to stick to your schedule. This is a great time to master prioritization; you may be “in” for quite some time.

Identify homeschool space

Perhaps your peers have homeschooled for years; suddenly, you find yourselves in the same situation, and by chance, rather than choice. Identify a dedicated space where your child or children can work on class assignments with good lighting, connectivity, and a sense of ownership. Encourage downtime, and recess; for yourselves and your kids.

And, for those of you out of work, again not by choice, and struggling with what to do to maintain a sense of calm, I offer these tips:

No one knows you better than you; work that to your advantage
Become a master of efficiency
Identify those areas of life most important for your well-being and balance and integrate them within your lifestyle
Know your limits
Treat yourself with kindness

What matters most is, do your best! There is no playlist…hundreds of thousands of moms, dads, and grandparents will be forced to balance homeschooling with their day-to-day work responsibilities. Life is a balancing act─ now more than ever before. All of us need downtime…be sure that you take the time in your day to appreciate life, be grateful, and be kind.

April 5, 2017 By Sharon Weinstein

Use Your Words…starting with “A”

How often have you told your kids to ‘use your words?’ When we were raising our now adult offspring, we really did not use that term. We noticed it when our kids became parents themselves, or when we watched the movie entitled, Parental Guidance with Bette Midler and Billy Crystal.

Whether we are raising kids, engaging employees, or collaborating with partners – we want to emphasize positive words. In comparison with good words, “angry words send alarm messages through the brain, and they partially shut down the logic-and-reasoning centers located in the frontal lobes,” write Newberg and Waldman in the book Words Can Change Your Brain.

So, I started with the letter “A” and I discovered these positive A words: ‘able, acceptance, accepting, action, activate, active, add, addition, adorable, advantage, affirm, ageless, agree, agreeable, aid, aim, abundance, accountability, accomplished, achieve, acknowledgement, adaptability, adventurous, agility, alertness, ambition, anticipation, appreciative, authentic, awesome, admirable, accommodating, ample, appreciative joy, actability, affable, alacrity, amiable, astounding, attractive, alive, achievable, acts of kindness, adaptable, adaptive, adequate, admirably, admiration, admired, adored, adoring, adoringly, advanced, advantageous, advantageously, affability, affably, affinity, affirmation, affirmative, affluence, affluent, afford, affordable, agile, agilely, agreeableness, agreeably, aligned, alluring, alluringly, altruistically, amaze, amazement, amazes, amazingly, amiability, amicability, amicable, amicably, amusing, appeal, appealing, applaud, appreciable, appreciated, appreciates, appreciation of beauty, appreciatively, appropriate, approval, approve, ardor, art of appreciation, art of stillness, art of well-being, assurance, a reason for being, accommodative, amiably, accolade, acumen, adjustable, admirer, admiring, admiringly, adorer, adroit, adroitly, adulated, adventuresome, and ambitious.’

Think about the words that you use on a daily basis. Are they positive or negative? How do you make others feel with your words?

Whether it is Parental Guidance or Words Can Change Your Brain…give positive words a chance. Use your words to reflect your attitude in parenting, in business, and in life!

July 27, 2016 By Sharon Weinstein

Your Environment…your choice!

Your environment is your space…it is your body, and the settings in which you live, work, and play. Your body probably started out on an even playing field 25 or more years ago. And, your home and work settings have influenced your body’s ability to adapt – to thrive and survive today and forever. Think about where you live, work and play, and think about the sources of stress that present on an almost daily basis and influence your ability to be well and to stay well.

Let’s begin with choice! The choices that you make, about what you put into your body and that with which you surround yourself, impact your outcomes – how well you feel, how productive you are, and how good you look. Are the choices that you are making healthy, or will they impair function? For example, is a can of soda on your desktop – eager to turn your body into an acidic environment that will slow you down, swell you up, and put you to sleep? I hope not!

The work-life connection

A crisis exists today. Millions of people are unwell, suffering from the stresses that are part of modern living: lack of sleep, poor nutrition (and obesity), exposure to dangerous pollutants, no exercise, and time pressures. And people — millions of people — are looking for solutions.

Workplace wellness programs are beginning to earn their place among necessities within the environment. Model programs for disease management are decreasing days lost from work, enhancing lifestyle, and increasing performance. As workweeks are expanding and stress levels are rising, more hours are spent at the workplace, and health takes a toll.

One of the greatest sources of stress for workers, regardless of professional role, is work-related. We all have the same requisite number of hours in a day – only 24. And yet, we try to extend those hours and make them equal 36 or more. It is virtually impossible, and our productivity demonstrates our failure to adhere to the ‘work day’ as a somewhat normal work day.

A workplace is only as good as how it treats its workers. Today’s employers are constantly seeking ways to assist their workers in managing their job responsibilities and their personal responsibilities and needs. Strategies for work/life balance help create supportive, healthy work environments; strengthen employee commitment and loyalty; and result in more productive workplaces and improved customer satisfaction.

As professionals, we have expectations from our work environment, from those with whom we work, and our future. Oprah Winfrey suggests that, “right now you are one choice away from a new beginning—one that leads you toward becoming the fullest human being you can be.”

If your path is paved with good intentions, but your work is unrewarding and your time is not your own, negotiate. Think things over and make a change. Negotiate for change in the workplace; work with your employer to improve the environment, your outcomes, and the company’s success.

As workweeks are expanding and stress levels are rising, more hours are spent at the workplace, and health takes a toll. Initiatives aimed at producing a healthy workforce, enhancing recruitment and retention, decreasing overall healthcare costs, and enhancing productivity and bottom line are evolving. Workplace Wellness Programs provide the structure, encouragement, incentives and ongoing support that many individuals need in order to make lifestyle changes. Embark on the journey to workplace wellness…and begin by treating your staff well!

It’s your choice! It’s your business! It’s your future! Make it a healthy one…

June 9, 2016 By Sharon Weinstein

Eat to live…

“A bird in the hand is the best way to eat chicken.” – Anonymous

Good nutrition goes a long way toward creating balance in one’s life! If your habits for nourishing yourself are not chosen with sufficient consciousness and awareness, you, more often than not, make choices that are not in your best interest. Good food choices support good health. For the past few weeks, I have been collaborating with the Power Women of NSA to achieve optimum health through food.

Think about it – as a society, we tend to choose poorly, relying on fast food, convenience foods and more! While the motto “moderation in all things,” is a simple and helpful guideline to create health, it needs to be interwoven with the motto, “energy flows where attention goes.” Balance alone will not give us optimal health, for there is a continuum of health practices and choices that you can and should make. Moving along the continuum of optimal health requires increasing consciousness and awareness about lifestyle choices.

How do we make healthy choices? How do we correlate the season with food choices that are easy on the wallet and on our health? Eating in season is not only possible…but healthy too. And let’s talk about our trip to the supermarket, convenience foods, cost, crops, taste, variety, and home grown – and getting through the summer without ruining our health!

The Supermarket Experience

Take a mental walk through your supermarket. Have you noticed how little fresh produce there is? Exclude the frozen and canned foods, and except for the dried beans and rice, you might be surprised to realize that none of the products in the main body of the store are fresh. They are all processed. Does it smell like food? How much of the products stocking the shelves are organic? We have heard of the problems with growth hormones. How much milk is there that is free of this? So much of what is considered “food,” is so deplete of nutrition and so full of chemicals that consuming it is hugely implicated in the rise in obesity/diabetes, cancers, Fibromyalgia and more.

Convenience Foods

Go through your pantries and refrigerator at home. How much of the food there is real and unprocessed? We hear all the time about how processed foods are not good for us nutritionally, but it takes more than just hearing that to realize the truth of it. And how often do you stop to examine your assumptions about the foods you are buying? I have been reading labels for years and years, and though reading labels definitely helped me buy healthier foods, it did not help me realize how dependent I had become on convenience foods.

Most all of us have been raised in the world of convenience foods. It has become our paradigm to rely on convenient, processed, prepared food. The generations in their 40s and beyond will not have had as much processed foods when children, nor as much sugar intake as those younger. Those younger generations have no real experience of what it was like to live in a world where people ate whole foods. Hectic work schedules lead to overuse of convenience and fast food. Do you eat and drive, talk on the phone, eat at the workstation? To this add that about 40% of all our meals are regularly eaten at restaurants or fast food chains, and very few of the countless options for us to choose from are organic, vegetarian, or serve beef and lamb that are grass fed. If the food is not organic then it is genetically modified. What we are doing to ourselves with all of this we hardly know.

Eating In

Can you remember when the family meal was a time when all family members were together engaging in a ritual that brought cohesion, relaxation, good conversation and laughter — great elements for proper digestion. Can you bring back the smells of the home cooked foods, memories of special tablecloths and dishes, the fun of candlelight dinner? Perhaps you had the bounty of coming from a family where everyone pitched to help with the preparation and clean up, so that when the meal was over, everyone could sit down and relax for the rest of the evening.

Eating Out

Let’s face it … we are all overextended, and Americans do tend to eat out fairly often. We might select foods that are easiest to get into our mouths quickly and on the go. The easiest foods are too often the worst for us: highly refined, processed, and packaged foods. Most restaurants will cater to special dietary requests. Never hesitate to ask for healthful choices. For example, most pasta dishes can be made with whole grain pasta in lieu of white flour; ask, and be pleasantly surprised.

Slow Food

The Slow Food movement is a call to reverse trends that have taken people away from these healthier practices. “Ultimately [living the slow life] is about pleasure and taste, knowledge and choice. Once we begin to take an interest in the enjoyment of food, and in finding out where our food comes from, we can begin to see the effects of these choices. When we shorten the distance — both literally and figuratively — that our food travels to get to us, we are participating in the Slow Food movement. Slow Food is about coming together as a food community — community producers and co-producers come together at the farm, in the market and at the table to create and enjoy food that is good, clean and fair. Slow Food is also simply about taking the time to slow down and to enjoy life with family and friends. Every day can be enriched by doing something slow.” (www.slowfoodusa.org.)

Quick Tips for Shopping Healthy

Shop the perimeter of the grocery store, where fresh foods like fruits, vegetables, dairy, meat, and fish are usually located.
Avoid the center aisles where junk foods lurk.
Choose “real” foods with as little processing and as few additives as possible. Remember, if you want more salt or sugar, you can always add it yourself.
Avoid foods that contain more than five ingredients, artificial ingredients, or ingredients you can’t pronounce.

Produce: Cost and Crops

Produce is in season – it makes perfect sense to buy fresh! Where do you go to find simply healthy foods? My favorite places to shop are fresh markets with great selections. You walk in and smell the aroma of fresh vegetables and fruit; your eyes are flooded with the beautiful array of colors of fresh vegetables and fruits that fill the space.

Produce is readily available and the cost of seasonable products creates real savings to one’s wallet. Even with the weather challenges we have faced, the crops look good, and taste even better.

Taste

Taste can be as important as cost. Think about it. Would you rather eat a dark red, vine-ripened tomato still warm from the summer sun or a winter hothouse tomato that is barely red and lacking in flavor? Fresh, locally harvested foods have their full, whole flavors intact – and you can taste the difference.

Variety

Explore what is harvested locally in your own area by visiting www.localharvest.org and identify farmers’ markets near you. You will also discover seasonal produce guides.

Homegrown

Although it is virtually impossible to eat locally and in season 100% of the time, we can make a good effort. If possible, grow it and pick it yourself. If gardening is not for you, visit a local farmer’s market weekly or join a Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) farm to acquire fresh products at local distribution locations. Determine what is in season now, and get started on the road to fresh! Why worry – read on!

Shorter times between harvesting and consumption enhance the nutritional value of foods. Logically, this means you should buy produce from your local growers in season. Local generally means 150 miles from your home. Visit the local farmers’ markets — and get to know the farmers. The more you learn about how the farmer farms, the better a consumer you can be. Another factor to consider is food safety. While buying locally doesn’t guarantee food safety, it does limit the processing, the time, the number of steps, and the numbers of human-to-food interactions between harvest and consumption. “Shipping is a terrible thing to do to vegetables. They probably get jet-lagged, just like people.”

Organic – or not?

Organic is a way of growing crops in greater harmony with nature, without using synthetic pesticides, fertilizers, antibiotics or growth hormones. Certified Organic products must be grown and processed according to the USDA Organic Standards with inspections to verify organic authenticity.

Organic foods are:

Regulated by strict standards and yearly inspections.
As low as possible in synthetic chemicals (pesticides, fungicides & fertilizers)
Processed without synthetic colors, flavors, preservatives and other common additives.
In greater harmony with nature using methods to protect soil, water and air quality.
Safer for farmers to grow.

Organic foods are not necessarily:

More nutritious than other foods. Freshness and level of refining have greater impact on nutrients.
Pesticide-free. Some chemicals persist in the soil for years; others come from nearby farms or water supplies.

Reasons to buy organic:

To protect the environment.
To reduce chemicals in your food.
To avoid genetically engineered food.
To avoid food processed with irradiation.
To avoid use of antibiotics and synthetic growth hormones in animals.

Reasons not to buy organic:

Products often cost more.

Recommended Produce to Purchase Organically or Chemical-free

Highest in pesticide residue: peaches, strawberries, apples, cherries, sweet bell peppers, lettuce, celery, pears, nectarines, spinach, grapes (imported).

Lowest in pesticide residue: onions, asparagus, avocado, kiwi, sweet corn (frozen), bananas, pineapples, cabbage, mango, broccoli, sweet peas (frozen), eggplant. (Source: Environmental Working Group)

So, go ahead and eat to live … making wise choices and maintaining your health!

April 30, 2016 By Sharon Weinstein

Motherhood and Mother’s Day

Years ago, I received a Mother’s Day card from my first-born daughter, who is now a first-time mom as a result of adoption; we are thrilled for her, and for the young boy who has joined her family and ours. I saved the card in a special place, in my home and in my heart…and I read it often. The card read, “I know a woman of strength and beauty. I have watched her for years…she is my mother.” What greater tribute could a mother receive?

We are blessed! My husband and I have brought three wonderful young people into the world that care for, and about, others. They are independent thinkers; they are bright and articulate. As a mom, I have been fortunate to celebrate many Mother’s Days – but where did this all begin?

Mother’s Day in the United States is celebrated on the second Sunday of May. It celebrates motherhood and it is a time to appreciate mothers and mother figures. Many people give gifts, cards, flowers, candy, a meal in a restaurant or other treats to their mother and mother figures, including grandmothers, great-grandmothers, stepmothers, and foster mothers. We have all had moms at one time or another, so we all have something to celebrate, even if it is a warm, or perhaps not so warm, memory.

Why do we honor the moms in our lives? Many believe that two women, Julia Ward Howe and Anna Jarvis were important in establishing the tradition of Mother’s Day in the United States. Other sources say that Juliet Calhoun Blakely initiated Mother’s Day in Albion, Michigan, in the late 1800s. Her sons paid tribute to her each year and urged others to honor their mothers.

Around 1870, Julia Ward Howe called for Mother’s Day to be celebrated each year to encourage pacifism and disarmament amongst women. It continued to be held in Boston for about ten years under her sponsorship, but died out after that.

In 1907, Anna Jarvis held a private Mother’s Day celebration in memory of her mother, Ann Jarvis, in Grafton, West Virginia. Ann Jarvis had organized “Mother’s Day Work Clubs” to improve health and cleanliness in the area where she lived. Anna Jarvis launched a quest for Mother’s Day to be more widely recognized. Her campaign was later financially supported by John Wanamaker, a clothing merchant from Philadelphia. http://www.timeanddate.com/holidays/us/mothers-day

Has Mother’s Day become another ‘economic venture?’ Mother’s Day expenditures on flowers exceed Valentine’s Day by 4%. What about the cards, candy, and other special gifts? I love flowers…just like other moms. How else can you honor mom? You can send a card like the one that my daughter did! You can serve breakfast in bed, do the laundry, the dishes, or mow the lawn. For moms without families nearby, you can offer to help a mom in your area by ‘paying it forward.’ Let’s celebrate the moms in our lives…and let’s make it special. They gave us life!

To start the process: